Angelina Jolie: The original Salt Bae

Welcome back film fans and connoisseurs of crap, to the Pound Shop Flix blog. This week, as I’m sure anyone who read the sneak peek and can remember 2010 guessed, we’re taking a look at Salt, a film starring Angelina Jolie as superspy Evelyn Salt. Now, as mentioned in the sneak peek this week, I have a memory of Salt being reviewed pretty poorly by Empire Magazine back when I subscribed to it as a young wannabe film buff. In truth however my research for this week has painted a somewhat different picture: the review on Empire’ website gives it 3-stars. 

Now 3 stars does not equate to an excellent film. But it’s not quite the kind of stinker, or even misfire that this blog is based around. This apparent disparity between my memory and the truth leads me to conclude that one of two things must have happened: either I misremembered the content of the review, possibly even mixing it up with The Tourist; or at the age of 17, I was an even more pretentious than I am now, and considered a 3-star film to be a failure. Regrettably, either is possible.

All of this of course is mere context reader, an insight into why I picked up Salt expecting good (bad) things. It is time now to discuss what I actually got.  Major spoilers ahead!

Let me begin by saying that I like spy films. I don’t really know why. Ideologically, the idea of rooting for government sanctioned killers wrestling with the opposing government sanctioned killers of ‘enemy’ nations to promote Western interest is increasingly nauseating as we move through the 21st century. I think it was the bold, ridiculous camp of Kingsmen– and in turn the camp of Roger Moore era spies which is pastiches- which first interested me. It was this, reruns of The Saint, and the mostly pretty good Daniel Craig Bond films which I think brought me around to genre. Salt is less camp and more serious fare- if undoubtedly OTT in places. However I’m afraid Salt never really earns its self-seriousness. The dialogue is as cliche as they come, varying from damned obvious to ‘this-sounds-cool-even-if-it-makes-no-sense’. This wouldn’t be such an issue if the motivations of the characters made any sense, or the moments which were supposed to carry emotional weight did so. I can’t really put my finger on exactly why emotional moments and important lines don’t really land properly. I think perhaps if the film focused more on the context of what was going on; why people are doing what they’re doing, why they feel how the feel and so forth, it would work a lot better. But background and relationships are given to us all to briefly- the most we get is a quick flashback, but sometimes we get as little as one line.

The action is mostly pretty passable, with some cool or inventive moments in places. It’s all style and no substance though, with blows landing with little impact and stunts seeming pretty improbable- yet somehow also not that exciting?

One thing Salt has going for it is its cast. Not one packed with huge names, but rather full of reliable sort-of household names and character actors who give a dodgy script a decent go. Liev Screiber plays the main, surprise, antagonist, being revealed as a traitor towards the end of the film. I’ve always thought quite highly of Schreiber. As much as anything else he’s able to give off a presence; a sense of menace or authority (or both) depending on the role he’s playing. This film is no exception. Opposite Schreiber as the good, but by the book, counter intelligence man is Chiewetel Ejiofor. Ejiofor has really come into his own with the sort of roles he deserves in the last few years. In a similar, though different, way to Schreiber, Ejiofor gives off an air of utter competence which makes him believable in almost any serious role thanks to his deep voice and measured delivery. I think its is these qualities that likely secured him the role as Scar in the recent CGI remake of The Lion King. He perhaps lacks a little of this trademark presence in Salt, though this is largely down to the script rather than the actor. Amusingly, Andre Braugher- likely best known these days to many of us as Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s Captain Raymond Holt- is in this film playing the Secretary of Defence; exactly the kind of serious authoritative role he sends up in B99.

Most important among the cast though is Angelina Jolie: Jolie was one of the most reliable pair of hands for this kind of fare during this films’ period, more or less guaranteeing a decent leading performance regardless of the quality of the script. She was (and likely still is) dynamic, expressive and striking. She gives us a performance with pathos and grit- or at least as much as the film allows. That she plays an arse-kicking female spy is great; but know, dear reader, that this comes at a price in 2010. She still finds herself doing things like covering a surveillance camera by removing her panties and placing them atop it. They don’t teach that shit in spy school.

The film is full of twists which do keep the viewer guessing and on their toes, but which don’t really feel very logical. All in all the film shows sparks of imagination in places and isn’t incompetent- it just feels rushed and underdeveloped. Not great, but not the worst. I am thus genuinely flummoxed by the fact that Roger Ebert gave this 4/4. These things are subjective I guess! But full marks strikes me as too generous. Indeed you may remember I was concerned in this weeks’ sneak peek that I might be wrong about this film, that it might be better than I was expecting: the good news is I was right all along. The bad news is I was right all along

2 stars!: **

-Tom