Alright party people?

I sat down last week to watch Red Sonja. This film, as mentioned in the preview post, is about a female warrior whose name the film bears, and who was lifted from the pages of comic books- in turn, based upon characters from Robert E. Howard swords and sorcery tales. This film is widely reviled, with critics mocking it and no real nostalgic audience love for it that I’m aware of! This is, broadly, pretty fair as it is not a good film. However, I don’t think it’s as bad as it’s reputation suggests. It has enjoyable moments! The problem is, these moments are largely sandwiched with boring filler, casual sexism and bad attempts at acting.

To give a brief overview of proceedings (and ergo give away some spoilers- so skip to the next paragraph if you intend to see the film), the story starts with Sonja (Brigitte Nielsen) being gifted powers by a very vaguely defined ‘Goddess’. These powers are given to her for the sake of ‘justice’ and ‘revenge’- for you see her parents and brothers were killed by the wicked Queen Gedren. Then, Sonja’s sister’s order of Warrior Women are attacked by the Queen and her minions, who take an artefact which can destroy the world. And so, Sonja and apparently passing Warrior/ Conan the Barbarian-Lite ‘Kalidor’ (Arnold Schwarzanegger) go on a quest to catch and defeat the Queen. This involves a good deal of travel, fighting baddies, and an attempt at sexual tension.

Let’s start with the good. Red Sonja’s fight scenes, whilst not a patch on modern, visceral, snugly choreographed action films, are enjoyable enough, with big swords clattering against each other, and a genuine sense of threat more often than not. Given that Sonja is supposed to be Goddess-Blessed warrior of supernatural strength and skill, and Kalidor is… well… the size of a small house, it feels right that they smash through waves of villains, though the odds are always stacked against them. It’s hard for me to comment to deeply on the quality of the swordplay, as I’m no expert, but this was very much the period when sword fights in Hollywood meant two people smashing their swords together until one of them decides to hit the other- rather than a believable conflict. That is not unique to this film though, and forgivable enough as the fights are pacey and well shot.

Another strength of the film is the set design and costume design. Though the film doesn’t have many standout characters beyond the central cast, most of the set pieces, and the people in them, are interesting to look at. They world being portrayed (‘The Hyborian Age’, where Conan too resides) does have an more-or-less consistent look and feel, and speaks to a kind of pulpy fantasy popular before the Lord of the RIngs/ Game of Thrones style fantasy became the norm.

Indeed, on the whole then, the films strengths lie in it’s big moments and set pieces- the problem is getting to them. The parts of this film where there is no fighting suffer largely from being under-written. I alluded early to the Goddess who give Sonja her powers being ‘vague’, and this sets the tone for most of the characterisation and world building. Nothing is adequately explained. Nothing is given enough context to feel like it matters. This is a recurring theme on this blog! A lot of bad films seem to think they can just focus on the big moments, and the rest won’t really matter. This is not the case. Between special effects or exciting stunts, romantic kisses or character deaths you have to build up the stakes, you have to make everything feel like it counts. Otherwise that explosion, that kiss, or that death is just a thing that happens on screen- it will have little to no affect on the audience. And that is largely the case here. Sonja’s motivation- her origin story, to use the language of Superhero flicks- is given barely seconds on screen. Her Sister’s death is anticlimactic as they come- she seems to forget about it, largely. This is not helped by the fact that Nielsen, at this early stage in her career (Red Sonja was her first film, and she was cast for her ‘Amazonian’ looks) cannot act. And no-one ever called Arnie a thespian either. It is all a bit stiff and lifeless.

(Content Warning: The rest of this review will contain references to Rape).

Finally, it’s important to overlook the films’ outdated values. I had almost forgotten to write about this because I knew about it before watching the film. I was prepared for it by previous knowledge and by the blurb on the back of the DVD case- it therefore came as no surprise, and not especially interesting. Nonetheless, it is important to discuss. The film features a female action hero, long before that was more commonplace in Hollywood- though it’s still uncommon now. That is worthy of note, regardless of anything else. However, it does not serve this heroine especially well. Sonja had next to no inner life, as a result of the sparse characterisation and Nielsen’s acting inexperience. Were she not the lead, she would seem like a sexy prop. And regrettably, what characterisation she DOES have is couched in the decidedly problematic use of sexual assault as a motivating factor. In the plot summary I mentioned that Queen Gedren killed Sonja’s family. She does this, and also instructs her men to rape Sonja, which they do. We mercifully only see a momentary glimpse of Sonja’s face when this happens. But we didn’t need to see it at all. It didn’t need to happen. Rape scenes are the subject of some controversy for good reason- they should not be undertaken lightly. There are stories worth telling with depth and care where a character survives a sexual assault and does something about it. This is not one of them. It’s a mindless Hollywood fantasy/ action film. The killing of Sonja’s family was enough on its own. Though it was part of Sonja’s origin in the comic books, this film is not a faithful adaptation of those books, so the filmmakers can, and should, have chosen to leave this out. Moreover, Gedren’s violence against Sonja was a result of Sonja rejecting her romantically/ sexually, meaning Gedren is a villainous queer character- another troublesome trope. It’s not that non-straight people can’t be villains, it’s that so often it is used as part of their ‘evil’ or ‘otherness’, including here. Finally, I think it worth pointing out that Kalidor, presumably for the sake of the audiences fragile manhood, saves Red Sonja repeatedly, and, despite her Goddess- given powers, is her equal in strength and skill. On top of that, Sonja and his romance is troubled (until the end of the film, at least) by the notion that Sonja has taken a vow that she can only be ‘had’ by men who have beaten her in combat- seemingly removing her sexual agency. Much of this can be attributed to the date of the films making. Our heroines in today’s action films tend to be served better. But the sexism is baked so much as a part of the film’s structure that it goes beyond the excuse of circumstance- and even of it didn’t, it would still be worth identifying.

So what you have, on the whole, is a film that is enjoyable for bursts, while the rest, including not insignificant sexism, one simply has to sit through. Some effective comic relief is provided by young, usurped child King Tarn (Eddie Reyes Jr.) and his faithful servant Falkon (Paul L. Smith, also known for playing Bluto in 1980’s Popeye). I wouldn’t recommend it to many, but if you have an affection for swords and sorcery fantasy and a good deal of patience, its watchable.

Best Performance: Eddie Reyes Jr. who, though still a child, is a better actor than either of the two leads.

Worst Offence: Rape as a plot convenience.

Elevator Pitch: ‘What if Conan the Barbarian… was a lady. A sexy one…’

2 stars!: **

-Tom